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2 posts since

29 Nov 2019

Hi Everyone,

My grandad has just found out that his cancer has come back and spread from his tounge to his jaw. It’s been the most horrific day and trying to help him make the right decision when you don’t know what’s the best is the worst feeling because everything is just a gamble and it’s his life that’s at risk. 

The specialist has given 3 options. 
 

A. Do nothing at all but he can’t give us a timescale but has said that he feels that the cancer is slow growing but the pain could get worse.

B. Under go a major 12 hour operation which involves cutting part of the jaw bone out, cutting half of the tounge off, removing the lymph nodes and then reconstruction surgery. But the doctor doesn’t know if he is fit enough.

C. Radiotherapy but this could also affect him really badly and he has a disease called Myasthenia gravis which is a muscle weakening disease which also affects his eating and swallowing. 

Not one of them is a good option so how do you help him chose! He is in his mid 80’s so everything is high risk. I just want somebody to tell me what is best but even the specialist couldn’t advise us.

I can imagine life with out him and want him to get better so badly.

Has anybody gone through the same thing? What is the survival rate? Is no treatment the best option? 
 

Any replies would be much appreciated x 

5501 posts since

11 May 2016

I’m so sorry your grandad’s cancer has returned and for the tough decision that lies ahead Chanel.

I hope some of our members who have been in a similar situation will offer their thoughts to you soon but if you or grandad feel it may help to talk things through with one of our cancer nurses then you’re very welcome to give them a call on 0808 800 4040, Monday – Friday between 9a.m – 5p.m.

You may also be able to get more information and advice from the Mouth Cancer Foundation.

Best wishes to you both,

Steph, Cancer Chat Moderator

69 posts since

11 May 2020

Hi 

I can’t offer any words of advice but me and my brother are going through a similar thing with our grandpa . 
hes 94 and has cancer of the jaw from an unknown origin , possibly his gums , it has spread so far there is nothing they can offer , they said it will just continue to grow . 
it’s just palliative care now but again they could not say how long he has left . I’m not sure if it’s not that common , it’s just all so sad .

sending you big hugs , W x

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